Do You NEED a Doula?

"Do you need a doula?"

I've seen that question swirling around the internet lately.  I've seen it in my doula groups.  I've seen it in my mom groups.  I've seen it pop up on Facebook.  I've heard many, many different answers from many different women.  But I wanted to weigh in myself.

No, a woman does not NEED a doula.

We actually need very few things in this life: food, water, shelter. etc.  A doula is not on that list.

As a doula, I don't consider myself a necessary component of a woman's birth.  After all, women give birth every day, all over this planet, without a doula present.  Some women love their birth experiences, some don't.  But they managed to give birth without someone reminding them of their affirmations and doing hip squeezes for them.

 

Think about it- what are we saying about women and their abilities if we go around saying they NEED a doula?  Don't women have the inner strength to achieve the birth they desire?  I think they do.

As a doula, I support the laboring woman and her choices.  I don't save them from their hospital.  I don't save them from their doctor.  I don't save them from intervention or save them from themselves.  I support them and their decisions, whether I agree with them or not.  Because it's not my birth and I trust and respect my client enough to honor the choices she has made.

I believe women are perfectly capable of having a fantastic birth experience without me.  Now, that's not to say that I can't make a difference at a birth.  You bet I can.  I can offer wisdom, support, guidance and a mean double-hip squeeze.  But these are luxuries, not necessities.